Damn forum maintenance, typed out a huge post. Anyway:
I usually treat programmed drums the same way as real drums if I'm not feeling lazy. Obviously these are the settings that worked for the project I copied them from, so ymmv.
Kick: highpass at 80Hz, narrow boost at 110Hz, 3kHz and 12kHz. Really wide boosts at 60Hz and 6kHz. (1-3dB).
Snare: boost 7kHz for attack, then Stillwell Rocket compressor which sounds great on snare.
Snare parallel send track: guitar amp sim for distortion, some reverb, mixed in really low, you're not supposed to notice the distortion, only the small amount of increased harmonics.
Tom bus: Stillwell Major Tom compressor, eq wide boost at 1.2kHz, big narrow scoop at 700Hz.
Overheads: small narrow scoop at 2kHz to give room for vocal sibilance (the same on the guitar tracks), high shelf at 12kHz, room impulse verb (very small amount and only if needed), a little bit of compression. High pass depending on how much snare and toms you want on the overheads.
Room: Usually compress the heck out of this one. High and/or low pass to taste.
Snare, kick and toms have a send to the parallel compressor track, which is set to really smash the dynamics. I use the Vladg Molot compressor for this pretty much exclusively.
On the stereo drum bus: really wide 3-4dB scoop around 500Hz, some tape saturation.
Good compressors: VarietyOfSound Density, Vladg Molot, Stillwell Rocket, Stillwell Major Tom, SSL Listen Mic, GVST G-Comp. Good eq, Stillwell 1973. (Can you tell I like Stillwell plugins a lot?)
